It has long been recognised that grief is a normal response to loss in life. Grief and its stages can occur in response to any loss whether ‘trivial’ or life changing. Grief can occur whether death is involved or not, and may simply occur in response to life-changing events. In veterinary practice we see grief in response to pet death, but also in response to pet loss, and to life-affecting changes to the pet (limb amputation, chronic illness etc). In fact grief in veterinary practice can occur in response to many situations (and not just when the coffee jar is empty!). Grieving people experience both physical and emotional traumas as they try to adapt to the upheaval in their lives brought about by the loss. It has also been recognised (though less publicly) that the grief experience with pet death is the same, in principle, as loss via death of a human loved one. These feelings can be particularly intense for the elderly, single people or childless couples for whom the pet is a ‘child substitute’.

"Grief felt for the loss of a pet is just as valid and can be as painful as the grief we experience when a person close to us dies. Regardless of the species, our animal friends all possess characteristics that endear them to us. For instance, our pets never judge us—even when we are wrong. They always love us—even when we don’t love ourselves. A pet can listen patiently to our problems and speak volumes to us without a single word. Pets frequently become close friends with their owners and a significant part of their lives. It is both normal and healthy to mourn their loss”
Lance Coy, D.V.M., Kindness Animal Hospital, Florida


Grief upon the loss of a pet is a very individual response. Some people do not understand why they grieve as much (or in some cases, more) for a pet than for a human being. In addition the support network of understanding and caring people may be smaller. When a human dies, their family will be supported with cards, flowers, and offers of food and companionship. This is often not the case when a pet dies. In addition, a funeral or memorial service for the deceased person will bring people together to provide mutual support and a sense of closure. Again, in most cases, this does not occur upon the death of a pet. Comments such as 'Don't be so upset’, or ‘you can get another one,' may add to the grief and feeling of isolation and loneliness.

Studies also indicate that there can be a correlation of the degree of grief felt, with the suddenness of the death, or to whether the owner lived alone. Grief does not seem to be linked as strongly to the type of pet (dog, cat, bird etc). Interestingly, cases of pathological bereavement, requiring hospitalisation and medication have been recorded with pet loss, as well as with human loss.